The People News, a free newspaper serving Cleveland Tennessee (TN) and Bradley County Tennessee (Tn).

Of Bradley County Tn.


                            The People News, a free newspaper serving Cleveland and Bradley County Tn.








by Toneeke Henderson

Everyone I know enjoyed their holidays, and  I am thankful that I get another chance to cleanse my path along life's  highway.

Strange verbiage I am sure to the wondersome souls who think I am a bit whacko or spiritually crazed. All I can  say in my defense is "you are absolutely correct." 

Now I have to confess that I was really re-writing  the New Year for a laugh, I decided to wait and use it later, to really strap your  snickers into a king size wax ball. I tell ya, choosing safe words or coded messages is really a challenge, as my editor seems to get really confused about  my articles after the first paragraph. (Oh my goodness did I say coded messages, geezz I

hope that don't get me in trouble, Chief Too Many may have read it.)

But that's OK because I know only other unique and  strange people like myself will totally understand. I changed my story line due to misplacing the computer that had the original article on it, (call it  premonitions) but not to fret as I know there are more confusing things to  rattle about.

You know the phrase… "Big brother is watching you?" Well  guess what! HE REALLY  IS.

Did you know they can see inside your house from the sky or space or

Toneeke Henderson

strange forsaken places they call "Chief Too Many's house?" I will explain that one in another article, maybe for Valentine's Day. After all, you gotta love something somewhere, I can  only laugh at what is in my brain.

I think Forest Gump should have been president and should have a million boxes of

chocolate because we all know that chocolate cures  everything.

And you know that feather that floated down at the beginning and end of the movie? I knew the bird it came from, his name is  Ralph.

Have you ever just wanted to disappear and after you did, you realized that it might be a good thing if you at least knew where you were? Yeah, me too.

Have you heard any good gossip lately? It really doesn't matter because if you did and you're telling it, which ya have to do because it wouldn't be gossip if you didn't share it. But that's a sin and we know we don't sin, right. (grinning).

So now that the New Year is here, did you really make

any resolutions or just a temporary solution to a voided  issue?

I know you are confused now, that's totally understandable. See, I even know, so you're OK after all. 

If it weren't for quirky little sayings or tidbits of confused verbal matter, would we really know anymore then we already do? I bet not unless I count the little voices that I hear. OK so the phones ring too, especially when  they aren't plugged in. Now that my friends, is a  hoot.

You cannot tell me you have not heard them because I just heard you say "hey that happens to me." Whoahhh, see what I mean, great vibes flowing through  here.

I am so glad that I am a real person. Well OK, I am living matter, a muse,  a whacko woman, a Venusian. Now I bet you got that one, from Venus silly. All right, well it's next door to Venus but hey you couldn't say it if I spelled it.  Anyway, so we will just say Venus cause it's in the neighborhood.

So what plights shall we endure for this New Year's course? Shall we decide that standing on one foot on a rock ten feet in the air will be a way to give tribute to the cranes? Perhaps we shall sit in crouched position and proclaim it to be Crustation's Day. I know, lets have Brooms Day. I can make a parking-lot just for brooms, yes that's it, we can each bring a broom and stand it on it's end and park them two by two to save on earth space. Yes, that is a whisping idea. I have a new 2006 model broom with extra seating room for expanded aging and it comes with a faux lucky rabbits foot attached (as we are animal friendly).  Yes, we can have striped brooms and dyed brooms, braided

brooms and tie-dyed brooms.  Large brooms, small brooms, and medium ones  too.  We could begin a broom city. Yes that's it, then our own state and our own nation and then our own country and our own broomship to reach the stars. Oh the possibilities are endless. Oh my goodness, it would be  broomalicious.   

Then again it is merely a Phantasmagoria. But it could happen, couldn't it. So with that thought I shall close this article with a simple penciled in summary,

Life, it is a simple effect that takes place whether we  attach to it or not. It doesn't really matter what matter you're from as long as  you have existed. Confusion is just untouched self-expectations.  Nothing to worry about as the earth turns it's normal rotations, and real witches have cars and everyone else has brooms, (now I like that one, I laugh proudly and I laugh for the one who knows what I am talking about.) In final essence I still believe that Forrest Gump should have been president and if I had a million boxes of chocolate I may not cure everything but I could sure dance another year naked under the moon in my parking lot of  brooms.